The original crew of the Phil leapt aboard their beloved ship and began beating the pirates with empty buckets.
'Vicious pirates!' shouted Captain Phil. 'We risk our lives to save your ship for you and this is how you repay us! We're an international organisation on no one's side. We deserve respect and admiration, not betrayal!'
'How does that pay?' asked the pirate captain. 'We're all getting a little tired of piracy.'
'We don't have any money yet. We were hoping to live on thank-you feasts thrown in our honour, but you kind of destroyed that dream.'
'You should have had an inspirational theme song to melt our hearts and make us fully appreciate all your kind deeds.'
'We're working on that. Holding a contest, in fact.'
'May I enter?'
'Only if you join the organisation. We could always use a second ship and crew.'
'What do you say, guys? Want to give up piracy and become international assistance givers?' called the pirate captain.
'Aye, captain!' responded the ex-pirates.
'Hooray!' shouted the crew of the Phil.